Those were the days, my friend.

oldies.
haha.

Enlisting on 6 March.
Lappy spoiled.
Less than 50 hours before I end As and get out of the system

oh well.
Those were the day my friends, I thought it'll never end.

haha k need to startt

k I really don't know whats wrong with me.

but its so frustrating.
so damn frustrating.

it seems as if as someone just burst my bubble (which I think someone really did)

all of the ideals I had, suddenly falls apart.

why am I worrying so much?

I don't know, but I am so damn angry.

angry at who? I don't know.

why is society so practical.
why why why.

screw life.
serious.

looks like accepting rejection is harder than it looks huh.
haha.

Life is not fair.
Sometimes dreams do not come true.
Sometimes you’re not the hero in the story of your life.
And sometimes, people die before they’re supposed to.
Life is not fair.
But fair has nothing to do with who you are inside, what you dream about, who you love, and what you stand for.
Life cannot touch that. War cannot touch that.

I'll make sure my ideals and what I stand for will not fade away.

but then again, how certain am I that all these will not change?

Inner Demon two.

didn't have a very good start to the day.

woke up to my mum screaming in my ear.

but oh well thats only because she got frustrated trying to wake me up from 7 till 9 hahaha didn't hear or feel her at all.

anyway, physics paper was good.

couldn't answer a few questions at first.
but keeping calm does work.
haha didn't lose my cool like i did for paper 2.

went back home and took 87.
was about to alight when someone suddenly said "eh limpin!"

got a real shock! haha.
it turned out to be jie en.
havn't talked to him for a while.
but oh well, glad that he said hi to me haha.
really put a smile to my face.

going to try and get things straight with people.
and make sure no regrets pop up again.

terrible living in them, and glad that I have the chance to get out of it.
some people never have the chance to do so huh. i'm blessed in that aspect. haha.

ugh my laptop is spoiled.
screen is damaged.
and idk why.
gonna have to repair it soon ):

downloaded a few games over the weekends.
angry birds, the sims, and zelda ages, all on psp haha.
but oh well getting bored of them.
hope Final Fantasy Type-0 English version comes out soon omg dying from waiting ):
don't wanna play jap cause dun understand. haha.

on another note, have been watching alot of videos on youtube, especially videos clips or audio extracts from scientists.

really admire how some scientists can be so poetic.
Richard Feynman, Carl Sagan, Richard Dawkins, they are a few I really admire.



gonna try and improve on my language for the next two years, as well as study for a few modules so that I can apc them if I do enter nus. haha. two years is alot of time if I know how to spent it wisely.

but for now, I have to try my best for geog. more specifically human geog.
threw away physical geog, gonna have to salvage the situation now.

and MOE hasn't replied me regarding TIP, so I guess they don't want me.
nah. it'll be their loss.
gonna look for a job.

Hypocrisy about Hypocrisy

Yes, i realised that I don't like hypocrites.

But, is hypocrisy always bad?

food for thought huh.

Takeaway.

been trying to something about today for a few hours already.

physics wasn't particularly great today.
oh well.

After the consultation with Ms Jay this morning, I realised that I have a very pessimistic viewpoint of humanity as a whole.

Recently (or not so recently) I've started looking at people differently.
I wonder why people think so much, why people are two-faced, why people lie.
so many questions. but no answers.
and I just decided to stop thinking about it.

well subconsciously I actually associated complexity with being hypocritical.

But Ms Jay said "this world is so complex you see. there is no hard and fast rule to say which country can mitigate drought or floods better cause they are so different. they are all so diverse. It is such a complex place. But, it is this diversity that makes the world interesting."

and I suddenly realised how i've been overlooking the positive benefits diversity has given to the world.

yes, diversity leads to differences in opinions, leads to conflicts, arguments.
but it is this diversity that also makes the world so big and beautiful.
how beautiful one place is and how different how it is from another.

and I realised that what I actually loathe is not human complexity, but human hypocrisy.

I like simplicity.
I just like it when things are simple.
no burden, no conditions to consider, no nothing.

maybe its an excuse to be lazy.

but still, its a joy having to deal only with things that are simple.

simple, not as in difficulty, but clarity.

But so much time has past that the boundary between complexity and hypocrisy has blurred.
People have become both hypocritical and complex at the same time.

well, glad that I realised the difference today.

If I had to choose the most important lesson from these two years, it'll be this.

Nothing is more unjust, however common, than to charge with hypocrisy him that expresses zeal for those virtues which he neglects to practice; since he may be sincerely convinced of the advantages of conquering his passions, without having yet obtained the victory, as a man may be confident of the advantages of a voyage, or a journey, without having courage or industry to undertake it, and may honestly recommend to others, those attempts which he neglects himself.

food for thought..

okay enough ranting.

want to get the papers over and done with.

very worried for geog.
and physics. ):

suck thumb and do it lah walao.

We'll win the war.

for the first time, I managed to win this battle inside me and confront my inner demons.

first battle won.

now for tomorrow,
and the many other battles in between.

Poison and Wine

neh too bad this wasn't like 2 years ago.

this is going to be a very big gamble.

gonna take whatever comes.
no choice.

3 days..

haha its been a while.

shouldn't have procrastination. ):
so screwed for stats and geog ):