Secondary One Orientation 2010

This is the only decent picture of the kids.

I feel like a failed parent now.

The camp was definitely a good one, but the impact wasn't there.
most probably because there wasn't a stayover, and so time spent with them was greatly compromised.

The only memorable things about this camp was working with Eliada for rush hour where the kids had a nice but hard time guessing how to pronounce her name. and of course, the kids.

I see potential in some of them.

sadly I didn't have the chance to talk much with them.
or rather, I didn't want to.

It was like 1e5'06 all over again.
I start to form an emotional attatchment to something, I feel responsible, I try my best but nothing ever goes my way.

I scolded at them at the first day (when I still didn't know them that well) and I promised I would'nt do it again.
It only spoils the mood.

after talking to them I realised that they were nice kids.

I really admire the other facils.
They raise their voices but never lose their temper.

I really didn't mean it that way when I screamed at them.
I didn't mean to burst their bubble and spoil the fun but I just got more frustrated the more I tried to control myself.

And after I scolded them the second time I couldn't get myself to face them.

I broke new year resolution number 1 even before the first month of the year is over.

The thing that really upset me was what someone said.
You have known me for four years and you should know better than to tell me not to be angry when I am sad.

Anger isn't the only emotion I can feel.
I thought you understood me better.

I don't mind depriving myself of happy memories but I robbed the kids chances of having them too.

I tried my best.
But still, is trying your best all that matters?

Anyway, thank you facils for the encouragement and stuff.


As for now, I can't do anything else but wish the best for the kids.
I'm sorry, 1e1.